You can only feel pity as you attempt to squeeze some entertainment out of these painfully mauled games
Today we're going to learn a new expression. "Rooted". To say that something is rooted is to imply that it is broken, useless, or otherwise highly displeasing. Now that we've had the vocabulary lesson, you'll all know what I mean when I say that Midway Arcade Treasures Deluxe Edition is rooted. Totally and utterly rooted.
Fight in silence fools!
Ah the memories...
That's mostly because these 29 games have been showed together with little consideration or thought and have predictably rebelled in the way that games do. Some will allow you to play them, but in a sullen silence that makes their disapproval felt all too clearly. Others have become blurred beyond recognition in places, perhaps as a result of their attempt to escape this terrible compilation fate. You can only feel pity as you attempt to squeeze some entertainment out of these painfully mauled games.
To give you an idea of what's included in this compilation, I'll list a few of the games here. There's Primal Rage, which is an apt way to describe how you'll feel as you switch incessantly between disks, Total Carnage, which is what has taken place here to these poor unfortunate games, Hard Drivin' which is what Midway will be doing to sell any of this compilation, and Rampage World Tour, the reaction of fans of these classics when they discover the travesty that is the 'Deluxe Edition'.
I can't complain about the price though, this compilation is very cheap indeed. Unfortunately you'll also be getting what you paid for, which is not a hell of a lot. It's quite disappointing given the games that have been included, some of which are undoubtedly classics, such as Mortal Kombat I,II and III. They deserved better than this.
You'll wish they never left the arcade...
Take that Midway Marketing girl!
The lack of care and inattention shows itself everywhere. It shows in the fact that each of the games has to be individually configured for the gamepad, in the fact that you have to keep swapping between two discs instead of just playing off one, in the fact that there are glitches with graphics and sound which should have been fixed and weren't, and in the fact that this is essentially Arcade Treasures 2 and 3 put together in one box and called Deluxe. Gamers might not have a reputation for being the sharpest tools in the shed, but we ain't that dumb.
Midway have also failed to add anything new to the package, such as any Internet play, or even LAN capability, thus making the whole exercise utterly pointless. There is multiplayer capacity, but if you're using your keyboard you're going to be getting extremely intimate with your friends to do so, probably more intimate than you ever imagined being or wanted to be. Essentially, you'd be better off digging up the console versions of these games and playing them. You'll have a much more authentic experience than this compilation offers, and you won't be throwing your hard earned money slavishly at these exploiters of memories.
They can run, but they can't hide...
Just pretend that it's Midways' building.
If anyone wants to organize a mob with torches and pitchforks to avenge the fates of these noble games, that'd be just fine with me. Or if you're feeling really distraught we can organize a support group or something. It's not good to keep that rage bottled up inside.
Top Game Moment:
TOP GAME MOMENT
Tossing those two infernal CD’s off a large cliff and watching them smash into smithereens. I like to think that they’re in a better place now.