Children and smartphones equal hell for school administrators, so why not turn them into pineapples? Indie studio Subaltern Games puts us in the shoes of a school principal where grades are everything.
The 'school tycoon' is now in Open Alpha so anyone who thinks they can coral studious pineapples or even attempt to educate actual children can try it out. Budgets, prestige, whiny parents... pineapples.
"As the principal, it is your duty to manage the staff and finances (even if that means fudging a few numbers), dealing with bothersome parents, creating curriculums, and ultimately churning out the best little test-takers possible for the prestige of the school."
"Will you work to retain the best teachers, or cut costs with a burned-out, underpaid staff? Will you help the underachievers reach their potential, or lie about their grades? Most importantly, will you deal with the complications of children, or simply sweep all their troubles under the rug by turning them into orderly little pineapples?"
Check out the Open Alpha for No Pineapple Left Behind on the.
• Manage the school's curriculums, students and staff without going bankrupt.
• Dehumanize the children, turning them into orderly pineapples. Or…
• Deal with the complications of human children, for potentially better grades.
• Address parental concerns or maybe ignore them altogether.
• Lump the bad students together, expel them or even lie about their grades.
• Maintain a small staff of top-tier teachers or a large group of burned-out, underpaid teachers.